Today I feel OK again. Though my abdomen is still swollen it is nowhere near as painful and I am so relieved. I decide to have a short spin on the bike, to take advantage of the warm sunshine and the upturn in my health. Strange how much I enjoy the ride. I take the track that runs parallel with the main road to Bembridge. I ride along the marshes enjoying the heady scent of June flowers and grasses and the satisfying crunch of tyres on the gravel. At Bembridge point I take the coastal off road path and make my way to the lifeboat station down by the sea. The enjoyment of such a simple pleasure is immense and I give thanks that for today at least, I am free of pain.
I receive a letter from County Hall with the official retirement day of July 11th. It’s strange. July 11th has had so much significance in my life to date. It is the day I married Paul in 1974, the day my father died in 2002 and now this. Life is strange sometimes.
Rachel emails me with a little anecdote. It makes me smile. She writes about the children being on holiday from school:
I took your advice at one point. I had asked them to clean up the toys before supper. Levana did a great job and Ziva just sat in her doll-stroller with a blanket over her (she was playing being in a wheelchair so perhaps that was part of the problem) and refused to help. So, instead of nagging her or getting cross I went and sat down with her and just started telling her a story about two best friends who played together all the time except one girl always did all the clean up and the other never did, and eventually the girl who never cleans up ends up with no one wanting to play with her because they don't think it's fair that they never get help. Anyway, Ziva was totally riveted by the story and listened intently, but when it was done she just said "Another story!" and continued sitting motionless in her wheelchair. Oh well. Maybe it will plant a seed for another time!
Children are not always predictable in their reactions. I remember going to a day course on solution focused therapy. Ben Furman who gave the lecture, related a story involving his daughter. He was trying hard to get her to sleep with the light switched off at night, so he lined up lots of simple rewards. The final goal of sleeping in the dark was eventually reached. The reward she picked following her success? A bedside lamp!
You can’t win them all but you do have to keep trying.
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